Sweet Sixteen

August 31, 2016

I’m still here! Just hit a wall. Got a lot of stuff to backdate. Meh.

Anyway, hey, look what day it is…

DAY
100

Round 15 ended with a lot of things looking hopeful, and the final four months of 2015 continued this trend. Then this asshole of a year began and things looked bleak, personally and for the world at large. But things are kind of swinging better again.

Day 5: Nationals game! After walking all the way there from Gallery Place because screw the crowded Green Line platform. Just to see them lose to the Cardinals.

Day 11: Well, that was an annoying day that rendered a lot of the previous days’ hassle pointless. -_-

Day 12: No more delays. Just book them.

Day 13: I wonder if the complication has passed. Still can’t tell.

Day 23: When people send you something liquid in a container that very clearly is not meant to hold liquid. :irked:

Day 26: Top of the World Trade Center, at long last. 😀

Day 31: UK voters, WTF are you doing?!

Day 33: Pizza!

Day 36: I feel so invaded.

Day 39: Well, the switch seems to have taken effect. Anyway, off to BWI to fly to Las Vegas for some reason.

Day 40: M&Ms Star Wars glasses. Your argument is invalid.

Day 42: Flying home across the country on its special night, it sparkled below me. 🙂

Day 43: TSA opened my suitcase and didn’t close the damn outer pocket when they were done.

Day 48: I just booked another one! Also, chili.

Day 49: Dairy Queen and Imagine.

Day 50: Meh.

Day 51: I think I just set something in motion.

Day 58: Republican Party, WTF are you doing?

Day 61: Rewatching Big Hero 6!

Day 69: Something about the Newseum, yucca fries, and a Canadian.

Day 73: Book the damn thing already.

Day 74: Booked! Also, Olympics! 😀

Day 75: Reading “Albus and Scorpius’s Excellent Adventure”.

Day 81: I do not have enough middle fingers for I-95 traffic in the sweltering heat.

Day 82: Connecticut!

Day 83: Yale Peabody Museum!

Day 88: What is this? Is this an Olympic event? Oh, it’s rhythmic gymnastics. I guess.

Day 89: Mmmm, Indian food.

Day 90: Aww, Olympics are over. But Japanese PM traveled from Tokyo to Rio de Janeiro via Mario pipe. Your argument is invalid.

Day 96: Atlanta! Theme is Turner and aquatic life and lovely Olympic park at night. And way overpriced revolving restaurant in hotel I laughed nervously at and backed away slowly.

Day 97: Atlanta still! This time the theme is civil rights, Southern cuisine, and Coke. And back to the gigantic airport to return home.

Day 99: New roof, I guess.

And…

Day 100: Went to dinner with some people but otherwise unremarkable. But a quiet ending to a truly remarkable run.

As these 100 Days of Summer draw to a close in a turbulent year, though leap years have a way of being turbulent as 2008 and 2012 certainly were, I wonder what is in store for the final four months. I have at least two more trips ahead, as well as a couple other tasks. I wonder what will become of some of what complicated the earlier part of the year. I wonder and hope that this year that began so rough can turn around and be pretty great in the end. Sour and then sweet, like that candy.

Well, I close the book on this round of the 100 Days of Summer, to do it once again for some reason on May 24, 2017, in whatever form the world will be in then. And given how things look, “whatever form” is right!

This has been Day 100 of the 100 Days of Summer, Round 16.

Atlanta 2016, Part 2: Civil Rights & Coke

August 28, 2016

Part 1 – Part 2

I got up a little after 8am, packed my little bag, and headed on down to check out of the hotel, as I wouldn’t be able to come by again later.

I wandered down Peachtree Street some ways to the stop, and soon enough here came the Atlanta streetcar. I had my MARTA card ready to pay, but there did not seem to be anything to tap nor did anyone ask. I got to my destination, for which I decided against walking as even at now around 9am it was already like 95 degrees, after what ended up being a free ride. Hmm.

Anyway…

Respect. *salute*

In front of which is some kind of sacred gas leak.

Continue reading “Atlanta 2016, Part 2: Civil Rights & Coke”

Atlanta 2016, Part 1: Turner & Fish

August 27, 2016

Part 1 – Part 2

Friday night I was supposed to be getting ready for the weekend but instead found myself eating ice cream and watching Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy and telling myself I’d get right on it.

Unlike Chicago and New York, I didn’t have to get up before sunrise as I snagged a midday flight. The next morning I parked in the Green Lot at Dulles and got the shuttle and went on into the terminal. No suitcase to check. Just my little bag with me. I brace myself for the TSA line and head down the escalator to it… to find no line at all. I walked straight over to the guy who checked my ID and boarding pass and mentioned I’m not sure I’d ever seen the TSA line not completely packed. “You just missed it,” he replied.

Way early for my flight, I went to the long C&D concourse where my gate was, near the beginning of the C gates. And I got to do something I’d always wanted to do but have done before: Walk from one end to the other! Touched the wall by C1 at 10:40am and walked all the way to the other end, touching the wall there at 10:55am. As I approached the latter, by a gate that was not being used at the time, some guy who worked at the airport was sitting in one of the chairs, watching me. Once I touched the wall and started back, he said, “it’s a long way, isn’t it? how long did it take you?” I told him 15 minutes and continued. Okay, so I guess this is a common thing here.

On my way back, I noticed this giant anthropomorphic kinder egg outside a duty free shop declaring a love for DC. Aren’t kinder eggs illegal in the US? If this thing is here, I can only assume it stowed away on a flight from Europe but got caught at customs. Must be waiting for a flight back out of the country. The professed love for DC must be trying to make nice with the locals so maybe it can stay, or it’s gloating that it got this far. Not sure which.

Continue reading “Atlanta 2016, Part 1: Turner & Fish”

New York 2016

June 18, 2016

So there I was at the Greenbelt Metro station at 6am waiting for a bus that was running late. It showed up finally with an apologetic driver, and we were heading north on I-95, stopping off in Baltimore to fill the bus the rest of the way. North we continued along this very familar megalopolitan expressway.

Why do New Jersey on-ramps have “No Turns” signs?

Eventually, the skyline came into view, and we were into the Lincoln Tunnel. I had purchased a ticket for 11:45am entry, and with the late departure, I was cutting it close. The bus stopped at its 33rd Street spot, and I zipped on out of it and over a few blocks to the subway station for the southbound C train. Which, seeing as I was in a rush, seemed to take forever. But it got there, all squeaky and smelly because New York subway, and many stops later I was out at Chambers Street.

Where to now? Well, my destination is rather conspicuous. I got in at 11:45am exactly and was admitted and led to security.

Which, holy crap, made us go through a backscatter machine. How… well, not ironic exactly, but something.

Now walking through what’s made to look like a cave for some reason, and there are the elevators. Short line for that, and up up up, through time, through 102 floors.

To some short film about the city. Then out to a hall to get a guide tablet if desired, and then forcible green screen picture so they can sell it back to you because every damn place seems to have these. Down to the floor below where the restaurant is, as well as a smaller cafe with quicker stuff.

And down one more floor to the observation deck…
Continue reading “New York 2016”

Ocean City 2016

April 30, 2016

Go east on Route 50. That’s it. You’re there.

First this meant the always fun crossing of the Chesapeake Bay Bridge.

Then through the stretches of rural marshland, interrupted by Easton and Cambridge and then Salisbury, where, despite running a little bit late, I figured I’d stop off to see the alma mater.

You know, they dropped “State” from the name in 2001 (against the wishes of basically everyone, despite any media about the change claiming students wanted it because we were sick of “Salisbury steak” jokes, which we really didn’t care about since nobody made those mindless jokes except for maybe a family member that thinks they’re funny but actually couldn’t find clever in a wet paper bag saying it once, receiving only a glare that means “are you being serious right now?” which they mistake for confirmation of their non-existent hilarity), yet even in 2016 the recycle cans still have it.

Continue reading “Ocean City 2016”

Chicago 2016

April 16, 2016

One moment in late February I’m idly browsing Southwest’s low fare calendar, and the next I’m saying “$72 roundtrip?! Fuck yeah, I’ll go to Chicago, why not?”

So I did.

I awoke just before 4am on April 16, got dressed and grabbed my bag, and was out the door. I parked at the BWI lot around 5am, waited an annoyingly long time for the shuttle, and finally got to the terminal after 5:30am. Argh! Look at that TSA line. How are so many people traveling this damn early? Wonder if I’ll make my damn flight… Oh, okay, line was moving fairly quickly actually.

I got my barely awake self to the gate and onto the plane, as the sun began to rise over the airfield. Isn’t it pretty?

Then we were off at the scheduled 6:45am departure time.

Two hours later, after a rather lovely aerial view of the southern edge of Lake Michigan and then the big city, we were on the ground at Midway. I made a glance at the long line at their TSA as I headed out, grumbling at what I might have to deal with later. And after playing with the machine a bit, I had my ticket and was on the L train.

Good morning, Chicago!

Continue reading “Chicago 2016”

Outer Banks 2016

April 3, 2016

It was a bit rainy on Saturday, so I went Sunday, April 3, instead.

Though I had reconsidered going at all after the state’s recent anti-trans asshattery. Why reward the state with my visit if they’re going to tell my trans friends to go fuck themselves?

Then it occurred to me. What does a state get out of tourism? Money. From said tourists coming in and buying things. So if I just go but don’t spend any money there, it’s all good.

So I got on the road that morning, south on I-95, then east on I-64 past Williamsburg and around Norfolk and south to 168, stopping along the way for food as I would be unable to get any afterward.

And then…

Uh oh.

What’s going on?
Continue reading “Outer Banks 2016”

Mmmm, Candy Hearts 11

February 14, 2016

“MY LOVE” What a sweet little candy heart you are!

“URS 4 EVER” Damn, candy heart, slow down!

“LET’S KISS” Well, you’re going into my mouth anyway. Close enough.

“NO WAY” Oh, well, can’t win them all. 🙁

Oh, hello. Happy Valentine’s Day! It’s time once again for the tradition that began ten years ago today, when I sit here and eat these candy hearts and gripe about romantic relationship stupidity.

I’ve said in the past that it’s people’s behavior and expectations around relationships and their partners that I take issue with, and that love itself isn’t what I’m against. That love itself really is pure and good.

I’ve changed my mind. Love is fucking stupid.

In fact, I’d go so far as to say it isn’t a good thing at all, that it is terrible, and really we should be recognizing it as the affliction that it is.

Love is a destructive illusion that causes terrible behavior and misery. When you’re in love, sure, everything feels all warm and sweet. At first. Then something goes wrong, and now all those warm and sweet memories turn to poison, no longer making you happy but only sad and angry. Someone who was once a source of comfort and joy is now just a reminder of shame and loss. You believed you felt some strong spiritual connection, but the bubble burst, and you feel more isolated than ever before.

People have a way of reacting badly to this, from making total asses of themselves in front of their object of affection and others to outright harmful or abusive behavior. Yeah, I’m not seeing the beauty here.

Maybe we should just remove “love” from our vocabulary altogether. Maybe just cut straight to what you actually mean when you say you love someone. Maybe instead of “I love you” it could be “I want to spend time with you” or “I’m deliriously happy when I’m with you” or “I want to kiss you” or “I want to have sex with you” or “I don’t wish you any specific harm” or “I want to buy a house with a nice yard and fight with you over money and dinner plates for the rest of my life” (also known as “will you marry me?”). In any case, maybe the only real response to a declaration of love is “yeah, and?”

I mean, it’s a loaded and muddy word. It distracts from what specifically is going on. It inflates importance of what’s being felt, adding some artificial divine quality, which really serves only to make it hurt so much more when it goes wrong, that the very essence of life itself has failed you. It’s just not worth it. There are much better uses of time and energy.

If only it were that simple. I get so afflicted just as anyone else.

Oh, well. There’s always the candy hearts!

“I-M SURE” Well, heart, most people aren’t sure of much of anything. You’re lucky.

“YOU ROCK” Awww, thanks!

“XOXO” I fucking hate that Elle King song.

Snow Day

January 25, 2016

So this past weekend, we got a shit ton of snow here. Yay! Lots of snow and the electricity stayed on. I call that awesome.

Ever watch some local network TV station during a big snow storm? All programming is preempted for storm coverage, so that we can stay up to date on new developments in the storm…

“Hi, I’m reporting from Reston, and yes, it is snowing here. Don’t drive! Wait, look, some dipshit is driving in this. Hey, dipshit, why the fuck are you driving? Come explain to us why the fuck you are driving.” *interview with driving dipshit* “Now on to Rockville.”

“Here in Rockville, yes, it is snowing. Oh, look, some dipshit is driving on Rockville Pike. And it’s windy. Oh, my God, look at the wind blowing around. Can you see how windy it is? I’m slowly freezing to death.”

“And I’m reporting from Dupont Circle. Oh, look, some weirdo is walking their dog, even though that’s not weird at all and people in much colder climates have dogs to walk and dogs still have to pee despite the weather. Let’s interview this person walking their dog and have them tell us exactly that. Oh, look, some weirdo is cross country skiing. Let’s interview this weirdo.”

“And I’m back in the studio. What do you mean there are people outside and not cowering in fear?! And now the weather map we showed you three minutes ago that has not changed in any significant way. Yes, it is still snowing.”

“Here’s footage of a local mayor or governor saying that, yes, it is snowing, and get the fuck off the roads, dipshits. Why aren’t you staying inside cowering?”

Ah, great fun.

Well Played 2015

December 31, 2015

Wow! Another 12-month ride and what a ride it was. Time for the usual cryptic recap. Let’s see…

January: Fire Still Worked

-Takoma Park to Hyattsville: “Be cool like us and lower the voting age!”
-Hyattsville: “Sure!”
-First reading passes!
-Yer a wizard, little brother!
-My phone is dead after nearly a decade.
-Know what that means?
-Smartphone!
-Ah, “Selma” is a good movie.
-Second reading…
-Is Hyattsville to join Takoma Park is being #16tovote land?
-Uuuuuunanimous!

February: 12th & Market

-Game food!
-If I’m going to do this, I’d better hurry up.
-Day trip to Philadelphia! Something about a museum and a Canadian.
-Did my TV spontaneously set a parental control block on a sports channel?
-Downton Abbey has a lot of tragedy, but it’s fine as long as they don’t…
-Okay, time to kick their asses.
-I might be too late. Oh, well.
-Or, no, maybe not. I misunderstood.
-Holy God, why is the fire alarm in the parking garage so goddamn loud?!
-Science articles!
-The dress is blue!

March: Multi-Piece Shipment

-Oh. I’m certainly too late now.
-Lots of bad news at once!
-At least we get a nice snow day. LOL everyone else left early because they’re scared of the snow.
-Wait, not too late, but can’t waste time.
-One full year on the job!
-Sigh. Did he really just yell at our waitress?
-Woman: “Are you an introvert?”
-Me, standing far away from everyone else: “What gave me away?”
-And, after almost ten years, I’m no longer a NYRA board member!
-Thank God.
-Vernal equinox snow!
-Playing a ridiculous game of hot potato in which the only winner is FedEx.
-Now watching Victoria be funny.
-Gahhh, I spilled pasta in the sink and burned myself!

April: Seventy-Seven Dollars

-Some Easter trolling.
-What do you mean I owe state tax?!
-Some event I don’t really want to be at.
-Some other event I don’t really want to be at.
-Someone needs to vent. Okay!

May: Have More Fun

-Trains and a door to nowhere.
-Night before birthday Nats game!
-Box fort.
-Do it! Do it!
-I didn’t do it.
-Cake!
-Okay, now I did it.
-Ugh, I have to report for jury duty.
-Narrow street is narrow.
-I think I can squeeze by…
-CRUNCH!
-And I just destroyed someone’s side view mirror. Ugggghhhhh!
-I haven’t had a truly terrible time driving in DC a while. Clearly I was due for a truly terrible time driving in DC.
-Virginia: “Hey, DC. Challenge accepted.”
-Three hours stuck on the beltway in middle of the night because Virginia is all “look at us, we’re Virginia, we’ll do late night construction and back you up for hours, because fuck you, we’re Virginia!”

June: 37 Years Later

-Oh, good, got out of jury duty after only a couple hours.
-Free donut!
-Belmont. Can you do it, American Pharoah?
-Final turn. Welp, here comes another horse closing in.
-Wait, no, that horse is quitting.
-Could it be…?!
-American Pharoah wins the Triple Crown!!!!
-Sense8
-Picnic!
-Emptying out old storage trailer.
-And Sugarloaf with little brother.
-Inside Out!
-Emptying out hotel room family was living in.
-And they’re off across the country on a train.
-But they left the Wii with me!

July: The Vine

-Chili and ‘splosions!
-WORLD CUP!
-Hey, where’s the air conditioner?
-A couple hours of pulling vines and weeds from backyard garden.
-There it is!
-DONKEY KONG COUNTRY!
-Clearing stuff out.
-What are you doing, laptop?
-Family came back east.
-Loud restaurant is loud!
-Minions!
-Family went out west again.
-They took the Wii this time. D’oh!
-Power outage at work = lots of screaming freezers
-Looking for new laptop.
-Hey, reached 69,000 miles on car on Day 69!

August: Timing

-Crash Bandicoot!
-Zoo!
-Alright, I booked a trip.
-You go in the Rack of Shame!
-Oh crap, I’m in trouble.
-No, it’s okay, I fixed it. For now.
-Car maintenance.
-What do you mean you have to keep it overnight?
-I don’t want a loaner car. I want MY car!
-Hey, I finally did the thing!

September: Yellow Lampshade

-I’m spending Labor Day weekend in San Francisco for some reason.
-Kathleen and I are visiting museums and seeing things.
-And a hookah fell on me.
-Driver: “What park is this?”
-Me: “Golden Gate Park.”
-Driver: “But we’re not near the Golden Gate Bridge.”
-Me: “…seriously?!”
-Stingrays! Sharks! Penguins! Snakes! Swamp!
-Chocolate!
-What do you mean United charges to watch the flight map?!
-I have a stuffed octopus now.
-Ugh, I forgot to do a thing and don’t have a good reason for why I forgot to do a thing!
-Middle Eastern Bazaar!
-Fezzes are cool.
-Sushi.
-Pope.
-Lunar eclipse.
-I’m invited to a thing!
-Now there’s a hurricane coming, compromising the thing.

October: Nine and a Half Hours

-Nope, hurricane is going elsewhere. The thing is unaffected.
-To Philadelphia and southern New Jersey! Something about mosaics, an injured squirrel, and a Canadian.
-Winter Festival script reading!
-Wow, twenty years of these songs that remind me of things.
-Gallery of Art and then Middle Eastern food!
-Collective Soul!
-Gah, I forgot about the emissions test I’ve been getting reminders for since August!
-I forgot to do things and I’m going to get in trouble for forgetting to do the things!
-Oh, wait, they don’t care about the things. Whew!
-Annual Sugarloaf climb!
-Passing out candy to adorable costumed children! And some teens and adults. LOL

November: 1:48pm

-I was sitting far away from everyone else in my group. Now with renovation, they’ve been moved next to me!
-I’m so happy!
-WES Auction: trying not to buy or sign up for too much shit this time
-Damn it.
-Did 97.1 go to Christmas mode the day after Veteran’s Day? I wonder why so much earlier than usual.
-Ugh, not another Paris attack.
-Think I’ll make turkey chops for Solo Thanksgiving.
-Heh, look at those turkey breasts, and all they’re complicated instructions. I’ll read them for the hell of it.
-Actually, this looks doable.
-Buy the roasting pan!
-Mockingjay, Part 2! It made me feel emotions!
-Alright, I’ll break with tradition and book a trip for Christmas.
-What do you mean the return flight fare went up $95 just before I clicked purchase?!
-Time for Solo Thanksgiving! Will I be lonely?
-Nope, too busy making the turkey to give a crap.
-Ugh, I wish this turkey wouldn’t keep tipping over.
-Is it up to temperature yet? Is it up to temperature yet?
-Okay, this thing has been in for about three hours. I wonder if it’s edible.
-Holy crap, the turkey is edible. I made a Thanksgiving turkey! Achievement unlocked!
-Solo Thanksgiving ftw!
-Lots of leftovers!
-Shit. Why does my whole downstairs smell like gas?
-And here’s the fire department.
-What do you mean you can’t smell it?
-Oh, wait, this other guy can. Good, I’m not crazy. I think.
-There’s nothing wrong with the heater? Good. Then why the gas? Odd.

December: Same Fan with Weird Stripe

-Spinach Bean Thing for holiday potluck at work.
-And Perfection. I perfected Perfection.
-The Good Dinosaur!
-Nutella cookies!
-Lots of Winter Festival rehearsals.
-Lots of cookies for Cookie Walk.
-I’m Muffin the Cat!
-Brookside lights!
-Where the fuck did my headband go?
-Star Wars: The Force Awakens!
-Less Christmas shopping as usual because already dropped a bunch of money on flight.
-Did I really make these peanut butter cookies myself?!
-Seneca Creek Winter Lights!
-Have lots of chocolate, coworkers!
-Silent Night selfie!
-Why the mother of hell did I book a flight on Christmas Day?
-Yup, no parking in Dulles Economy Lot.
-Oh, wait, there’s some spaces.
-My feast of roast beast is in the form of a sandwich from Potbelly. Still counts.
-I called it roast beast when I ordered it. They didn’t notice.
-Did the flight crew just give us the pre-flight safety info in the form of a paraody of A Visit from Saint Nicholas?!
-The flight map is on my phone! The flight map is on my phone!
-Me, to family: “I come from the east bearing gifts after following a star.” Technically true.
-Some prix-fixe prime rib for Christmas dinner! Mmmm.
-Some relatives I haven’t seen in forever.
-After a few days of that, time to come home.
-What do you mean the flight is oversold and I can’t get on the plane?!
-First the fare going up right before I booked and now this?!
-Oh, wait, they got me on after all. Yay!
-Holy crap, Dulles is foggy!
-Back to work and package related annoyances.
-Screw, let’s get some snow crab legs and end this year already.
-And, holy crap, how the hell did I manage to post every day in December?!
-Oh, because all the posts are crap that I wouldn’t post the rest of the year. Meh.

What a year! I feel like big things are happening. There were lots of changes in this year, and there’s still plenty of promise, plenty I’m waiting to see how they turn out. Isn’t that the business of life? Something like that.

Goodbye, 2015! We had a time. Alright, 2016. I see you up there in Times Square. Bring it on!