Don’t be so possessive.
Call? Like… on the phone?! Ain’t no one worth that!
Alright, it’s Valentine’s Day. I skipped last year, but here’s one of these once again.
I think I’ll pick on Stranger Things for the moment. Or not so much “pick on” but this exchange from Season 3 jumps out at me.
Mike: What did you think, really? That we were never gonna get girlfriends? That we were just going to sit in my basement all day and play games for the rest of our lives?
Will: Yeah, I guess I did. I really did.
I guess the intended reaction here is something like “aww, these kids are growing up, putting away childish things, etc.” and that Will Byers, while you feel bad for him, will understand soon enough.
Screw that. He has the right idea.
Spending all day with friends working on something fun and creative, like the RPGs they play? Hell yeah! That is absolutely something you want to maintain as long as you can.
But Mike was pulling away from that due to his relationship with Eleven. Which I guess is supposed to be a sign of maturity, that romantic relationships must be the priority.
As must familial relationships. In fact, the importance placed on (cis-het) romantic relationships is part of it, in that it would involve pairing up with someone the family approves of, of the same culture or religion or race, so that they will make babies who will continue that family line and that culture or religion or race.
As such, platonic friendships get deprioritized, those friends less important than family or romantic partners. You’re told those relationships will come and go, that family will always be there. Which is a load of bullshit, of course. And it’s usually members of your family who try to instill “nothing is more important than family” into you, so you can see the conflict of interest.
Friendships are chosen by the individual due to mutual interest and affection. There’s no familial bonds or hormones running the show. Because of this, they are considered less important because they’d likely break apart easily. But actually that’s what makes them superior. This relationship wasn’t chosen for you by birth. You don’t want to have sex with them (necessarily). You just both enjoy each other’s company and find each other comforting and fun, and that is goddamn wonderful.
Sure, as life throws changes at you, friends can drift apart as their common bond stretches and weakens. But that absolutely happens with familial and romantic relationships, too. That’s not an indication of a relationship’s importance. That’s just life.
In fact, because a platonic friendship is expected to be fleeting, while familial and serious romantic relationships are expected to go on for life (complete with undeserved shame and erasure when they don’t), it’s perhaps more impressive and special when they do last a long time.
I guess these damn hearts seem like they’ve lasted a long time, too. Don’t know how impressive that is.
Yikes. Let’s get to know each other better first?
My thoughts exactly.