What the hell? – Page 13

Milk or Water

May 20, 2010

I hereby decree…

You don’t have anything to drink.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve gone over to someone’s house, and been expected and invited, and when either I asked if they had anything to drink or they offered something to drink, and I asked what they had, they replied, “Milk. Water.”

*facepalm*

So, in other words, you don’t have anything. Who the hell goes to someone’s house to drink fucking MILK? Water might be okay, even though they’re usually just talking about unfiltered tap water.

It’s one thing if I’m just one guest, or one of two or three. But I’ve seen this even when someone is hosting a good sized gathering at their house, and there isn’t shit to drink besides those two non-options. And probably didn’t bother to tell the guests beforehand to bring their own drinks.

Maaaybe there might be juice. Depends what kind of juice. But that’s at least something. It actually has flavor. Same with iced tea, so long as it’s actually sweetened.

Or sometimes they might have juices, sodas, etc. Except they didn’t bother to put any of it in the refrigerator beforehand, so it’s all warm! Lame!

I don’t mean to sound like as a guest to someone’s house that means I’m entitled to them having stuff I like. Yet if I brought my own drinks without being invited to do so, could be seen as rude. *shrug*

Of course, got to wonder, is milk and water all they drink? Or did they just happen to run out of real drinks right before having guests over? Or is this a common case of hosting fail?

Now, if you don’t mind, I’m thirsty, and am going to get some orange juice. The kind fortified with calcium so I don’t have to drink milk! 🙂

Self-Sacrificing Saints

May 9, 2010

Alright, I think after not doing it the past two years, I’ll throw in yet another anti-Mother’s Day spiel. Why not?

Although, in a weird change of pace, I’m not so much attacking mothers this time but more the stereotypes and lofty expectations, the vision of what an ideal mother is supposed to be.

I heard a quote the other day (for those of you here in the DC-area, it was 97.1 WASH’s “thought of the day” they do every morning) which was something like “when there are four pieces of pie left for five people, it’s the mother who says ‘I never cared too much for pie anyway.'”

Another example. On a Simpsons episode from last year or so, at the beginning, the family is making these shoeboxes so they could watch the upcoming solar eclipse. They each have their own, but Homer is a dumbass and breaks his and thus can’t watch the eclipse. What does Marge do? Practically without thinking about it or even being asked, she hands hers over to him, and now she has to be left out of watching the solar eclipse (only to end up looking up anyway and getting blinded).

In both scenarios, WTF? People act like “oh, mothers are so wonderful, they never think of themselves!” Uh, not quite. More like they are expected to never think of (or for) themselves! Had Marge not given Homer her shoebox and told him “you broke yours, your loss, go to hell”, then she would have looked like a bitch. Had the mother taken one of those four pie pieces and someone else had to go without, she would have looked greedy.
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Athletic Apologism

March 27, 2010

So I’ve had the NCAA basketball games on to see just how hard I failed at filling out my bracket at work. Yes, I failed hard, but given how this year’s tournament has gone, so has everyone else.

During the ads, they occasionally play some NCAA ads showing the athletes also doing math or working in a lab or dressed all business-like in an office, saying (promising?) that NCAA athletes will end up going pro in something other than sports.

Alright, I know “smart” people (if I count as that is certainly arguable) shouldn’t say things like what I’m about to say, but I’ve seen little real reason otherwise.

Being a professional athlete is still a legitimate career. Just as much as any teacher, scientist, office manager, etc. Therefore, I find it absurd the NCAA has to practically apologize for showing college students, who are apparently supposed to be training themselves to be the next great intellectual leaders, out playing with a big orange ball instead of doing math problems. That playing basketball or whatever other sport isn’t “intelligent” but just a waste of time (that we make ill-fated bets on). Which, of course, is all kinds of bullshit.
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Mmmm, Candy Hearts 5

February 14, 2010

*munches candy hearts*

Alright, for this fifth installment, what else is stupid about relationships?

Couples who seem to think they have a monopoly on each other’s personal relationships with anyone. Like a guy who is talking to a girl, and the girl’s boyfriend comes up to him all like “hey, what the fuck are you doing talking to my girlfriend?” Even if the conversation couldn’t be less about sex or any other “incriminating” topic.

Though of course it’s just a TV show, just like on House when he’s having all those hallucinations about Amber, and at first he lied to Wilson about it to say he was imagining Kutner instead, until he accidentally lets slip that it’s really Amber, and Wilson is all like “why are you hallucinating about my dead girlfriend?” Yeah, right, Wilson, not like House knew Amber as anything else. Not like she was the last person removed from his reality show-esque competition for his new diagnostic team. Not like she was already in his life before you were ever with her. Nope, she became your girlfriend and suddenly everything about her had to go through you. :rolleyes:
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The Skinny

February 5, 2010

And now, for a slim and slender edition of…

SHUT THE HELL UP!!!!

People who say shit like “OMG, look at you, you’re so skinny!” Sounding like they’re jealous. Sounding like they’re cheering for you. Sounding like both. They’re so sure they just made your day! After all, so long as you’re as skinny as humanly possible, your feminine life is a success.

Except it’s seriously fucking annoying! Hell, my sister even takes offense to that, finding it no different from commenting on how fat someone is, not to mention that being skinny often isn’t a matter of proper dieting or whatever to maintain an acceptable appearance but often a sign of sickness or being underweight (that’s right, folks, that’s a real thing!) when you’re trying to get UP to a healthy weight.
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Stem Cells

February 3, 2010

What the hell is the big controversy over stem cells?

Abortions are still going to happen, as are regular miscarriages for that matter, so the embryos aren’t going to turn into people anyway. But their stem cells are a gold mine of medical innovation! It’s like the little guys didn’t make it to post-uterine life, yet they still get to do some good in the world by giving their cells to help save lives.

Yet, to crazy anti-choice assholes, this isn’t good enough. And I call them anti-choice and not pro-life in this case because they really have no business calling themselves that when this is how their morals manifest, in railing against something that will preserve life. To them, because abortion is wrong, that means using stem cells is wrong.

Yeah, because women totally only get abortions to donate stem cells! Didn’t you know? Not because of life circumstances that make carrying the pregnancy to term extremely unfeasible, but because they want to contribute to DEATH SCIENCE!!! Right…

I mean, if someone is shot to death, but some of their organs are viable enough to donate, would you protest the transplant because the organs only became available because of the sin of murder? Yeah, didn’t think so.

TSA Fail

December 27, 2009

So on Christmas Day, there was another terrorist attack attempt on some flight from Amsterdam to Detroit. As always when such occurs, TSA craps out some more passenger restrictions in its predictable kneejerk reaction. Here’s the article.

So, basically, some guy tried to blow up the plane but failed miserably. The passengers saw what he was trying to do, seeing how very close they were to a horrible fiery death, and leapt up and subdued him, stopping what could have been a horrible Christmas for a lot of people.

How does the TSA respond? By making it illegal for passengers to move around in the last hour of the flight. So in other words… what the heroic passengers did is now against the rules. Because how dare they move around during a flight, when they should have been good little people and… let the terrorist kill them all. *headdesk*

And because a fucking terrorist will totally obey these little rules, right?

Some other rules I heard of include not allowing passengers to know the flight path or what cities or landmarks they are near. Which pisses me the fuck off because I think this means that airlines that allow you to watch your flight path on the little screen in front of you, such as JetBlue and British Airways, will now no longer be allowed to have that feature, a feature I fucking LOVE! What the shit?! :doitnow:

That’s the TSA. It’s not important for them to actually stop terrorists when the most important part is to just LOOK like it.

Caring or Controlling

December 26, 2009

I hereby decree…

Caring about someone does NOT give you the right to be controlling, obsessive, or insulting.

Let’s say your mom calls you when you’re heading out of town or something. She calls again a few hours later. Again the next day, about three times. And again. And again. Oh, and let’s say you finally call her on it, telling her she does not need to be calling you constantly. What is her reply?… “Aww, but I just worry about you, because I care about you.”

And that’s just a mild example, what with all the controlling things parents are advised to do with their teens that make prison look like a haven of privacy rights. Why are parents so disrespectful of privacy and insulting to intelligence? Because they care. And because they care, they have free rein to do whatever they want, and you should be grateful for it, because they care.

Bitch please! Yes, you CAN care about someone without constantly worrying they’re about to fall off a cliff or get eaten by a rabbit or something. Are you so messed up in your perception of love that you don’t realize that? Are we all expected to be so starved for love and affection and consideration that we’ll sacrifice our dignity and comfort for it at every conceivable opportunity?

Or, here’s a crazy thought. How about both caring for someone AND respecting them at the same time? *gasp, fall down* What a concept!

A few years back, my sister didn’t come home that much, constantly out with friends and whatnot. My dad was always so worried, but I wasn’t. When I mentioned this, he told me I must not care all that much about her and that I must want bad things to happen. I said that’s not true at all, that I of course care about her but at the same time respect that she can take care of herself. He insisted that was impossible. Moron.

Oh, but it’s okay to be obsessive, to call 10 times a day, to not let someone do something on their own because if you do it they won’t get hurt, to belittle someone for their beliefs because in your measly organ you call a brain those beliefs are somehow dangerous or make this person unfulfilled… because you CARE. And that’s carte blanche to just take control of everything about this person.

You just didn’t account for the fact that this person cares for her own self way too much to let the likes of you stick your ass into her business. So fuck off.

Separate Worlds

December 22, 2009

You know what annoys me? Think of any fantasy or sci-fi storyline, be it a book, movie, video game, or whatever, in which there are separate worlds or universes that somehow end up getting access to one another. One I’m thinking of is the His Dark Materials trilogy. The Chronicles of Narnia is like that to a point. Harry Potter sort of. Such is also the case in the game Kingdom Hearts, which I’m currently playing and is all kinds of awesome.

Yet there is one common theme: the worlds having access to one another is apparently a BAD thing. So in some stories, the very object of what the protagonists are doing is to close the worlds off from one another, because that allows evil to seep through or is otherwise not the natural, correct order of things. Even though the protagonist is often making friends from denizens of these other worlds, they’ll have to separate forever because they can’t coexist when they’re from different worlds.

(I’m going to be giving away ending details to the His Dark Materials trilogy, so if you don’t want spoilers for it, go out and read it before you read this further. You’ve been warned.)
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Christmas Voyeur

December 14, 2009

Some Christmas songs are so terrible they are worth being griped about multiple times. I speak again about the entity responsible for horrid neuron-genocide known as “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus”.

Really, it does the same thing that “Santa Baby” does, in that it actually sort of implicitly sexualizes Santa Claus. In the case of “Santa Baby”, it’s about some chick wanting Santa to hurry down the chimney and bring her presents, and it’s sung in such a tune that those “presents” could be just about anything and certainly not all she wants (giggity). Which is messed up when you figure Santa Claus is like 1700 years old, and unless the singer is supposed to be Mrs. Claus, we’re talking a girl with some major daddy issues.
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