{"id":651,"date":"2010-12-20T11:06:56","date_gmt":"2010-12-20T16:06:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.eightminefortress.com\/surewhynot\/?p=651"},"modified":"2023-05-29T02:41:10","modified_gmt":"2023-05-29T07:41:10","slug":"stork-sex","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.eightminefortress.com\/surewhynot\/index.php\/2010\/12\/20\/stork-sex","title":{"rendered":"Stork Sex"},"content":{"rendered":"

I admit it. I find myself actually offended at the portrayal of storks being where babies come from. Or any portrayal other than sex and pregnancy.<\/p>\n

Thankfully, I was never taught that stork bullshit. Would be a little hard since my sister was born when I was almost four, and I remember Mom being pregnant with her. Of course, it was many years after that before I knew anything about sex being what causes pregnancy. And even though that was more a matter of never being all that curious about it rather than the info being actively kept from me, it still annoys me that I was almost ELEVEN before I knew anything about that pregnancy-causing act.
\n
\nBut the stork story? Ugh! I mean, I find myself hoping that no one has ever actually been told this story and it’s merely a meme for some reason. Then I see that stupid ad (that I totally forget what it’s advertising) where a bunch of kids are asked where babies come from, and they give adorable little “innocent” answers of the stork, the hospital, clouds, and other crap.<\/p>\n

This isn’t cute. You’re feeding these kids lies, listening to them repeating them, and wetting yourself with joy over their “innocence”. That’s not creating a happy childhood. That is tricking someone. And tricking someone is not meant to benefit the one being tricked, but to exploit them for the tricksters amusement.<\/p>\n

And why? Because, oh noes, you could never ruin little kids’ fragile little minds with the slightest knowledge of sex! That would be bad for some reason that nobody bothers to come up with! \ud83d\ude44<\/p>\n

I’ll close with this excellent quote from one of my favorite movies, Addams Family Values!<\/p>\n

Young Girl:<\/b> And then Mommy kissed Daddy, and the angel told the stork, and the stork flew down from heaven, and left a diamond under a leaf, in the cabbage patch, and the diamond turned into a baby!
\nPugsley:<\/b> Our parents are having a baby too.
\nWednesday:<\/b> They had sex.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Wednesday FTW!!!<\/p>\n

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I admit it. I find myself actually offended at the portrayal of storks being where babies come from. Or any portrayal other than sex and pregnancy. Thankfully, I was never taught that stork bullshit. Would be a little hard since my sister was born when I was almost four, and I remember Mom being pregnant … Continue reading “Stork Sex”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-651","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-what-the-hell"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eightminefortress.com\/surewhynot\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/651","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eightminefortress.com\/surewhynot\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eightminefortress.com\/surewhynot\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eightminefortress.com\/surewhynot\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eightminefortress.com\/surewhynot\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=651"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.eightminefortress.com\/surewhynot\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/651\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2272,"href":"https:\/\/www.eightminefortress.com\/surewhynot\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/651\/revisions\/2272"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eightminefortress.com\/surewhynot\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=651"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eightminefortress.com\/surewhynot\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=651"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eightminefortress.com\/surewhynot\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=651"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}