That’s another Christmas song and phenomenon that irks me. I mentioned it last year in the Fallible Family entry, but I keep hearing this song so I’m thinking of this again.
“If you want to be happy in a million ways, for the holidays, you can’t beat home sweet home!”
The whole song is basically “leave wherever you are and go home several states away!”
Screw that, these people are already at home! What, “get the wife and kiddies in the family car”? Wherever you’re taking the wife and kids, it’s not their home. It’s not even yours anymore. Their home is the place you’re taking them AWAY from, asshat!
That man you met in Tennessee who’s heading to Pennsylvania for pumpkin pie? No, his home is not in Pennsylvania. I think, just maybe, it’s in Tennessee, since you just said he lives there!
Then again, if I were in Tennessee, I’d want to go to Pennsylvania since it’s the lesser evil of the two places! Or better yet, en route to Pennsylvania, just stop off in Maryland, since that is where my home is!
And happy in a million ways? How exactly? Are you so mentally immature that you must keep running back to mommy or else you’ll cry yourself to sleep? Or, here’s a thought. How about those supposedly magnificent parents get off their asses and come visit you for Christmas?
Or is it that the kids are always the movable ones? That’s another stupid thing. So often when there are visiting relatives, it is the kids who have to give up their beds and go sleep on the couch so some visitors can use their beds. But what if the kids were the visiting ones? Nope, they’re still kicked to the couch. And during meals, kicked to the “kids table”. Heh, you call that family gathering? Yay, being marginalized and displaced, what happy Christmas memories! 🙄
