December 31, 2009

LOL 2009

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Going Places,NYRA Happenings — Katrina @ 11:51 pm

The year that began as elusive is now known and past, with of course the expected lulz. So, just like last year, here’s some random highlights by month. Enjoy!

January: Fort Belvoir

-Me to fye: You can’t ban unaccompanied under-15s from the store.
-Cedric?! Why… why aren’t you moving? And lying on the bottom of the tank…? :(
-LOL my boss set the dumpster on fire with his cigarette
-Holy shit, it’s Vicky!
-The Youngest Candidate viewing at GWU = win!
-Whoa! Slumdog Millionaire is… whoa!
-Vicky, Alexandria is a big place. Where exactly do you need to go?
-Okay, it’s “Fort Belvoir” not “Fort Belvick”. And Fort Belvoir is not in Alexandria.
-Obama! Obama! Obama!
-Screw work, let’s all just watch the inauguration.
-Uh, oh, acetonitrile shortage! If we run out, we’re screwed!
-ZOMG! Case Closed on Funimation channel!!!
-Yeah, great, ski lift, try to rip my arm off!
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December 30, 2009

Wolf Alarm

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Random Crap — Katrina @ 10:40 pm

We’ve all heard the story “The Boy Who Cried Wolf”. Which is why it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense that I’m about to recite it.

Boy is left to watch over some sheep or villagers or whatever, to alert them if a hungry wolf comes by intending to eat them all up. Well, being a smartass, he cries “Wolf!” one night just to troll the villagers, and they figure how he’s screwing with them and kick his ass. The next night, he’s patrolling once more, and again trolls the villagers by screaming that there is a wolf coming, only for them to find no wolf and get pissed again. On the third night, because it’s always the third time in any of these stories that the interesting thing happens, he is out patrolling again and he actually does see a wolf. Oh shit! So he cries “Wolf!” to the villagers, who tell him to STFU and that they’re not falling for it again. So the wolf eats the boy and all the villagers. The end.

The moral of the story? Well, there are two. No, neither is the one you’ve always been taught is the moral. In the two possible real morals to this story, those villagers are fucking stupid.

First moral: If you cannot trust your alarm system, get a different one. Otherwise, if you’re going to ignore it anyway, what good is it? So the idiot villagers should have sent someone else to watch for the wolf.

Second moral: Even a liar sometimes tells the truth!

As demonstrated so nicely in the US Acres segment “The Wolf Who Cried Boy”. 🙂

December 29, 2009

I Built That

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Think About It! — Katrina @ 11:35 pm

Construction and architecture must be a rewarding field. I mean, you wouldn’t think so at first, at least not for the construction workers, as architects are considered a “respectable” career. But this goes for them both. They are involved with, obviously enough, putting up buildings, big and small, homes and offices, churches and schools. And those buildings will stand there proudly for most likely a very long time, all time that all the hard workers that contributed to it, whether designing the plan or doing the actual construction, can point to it and say that they built this, that this building and all its purposes are here because of their hard work.

It was eight years ago today that my family took a little 2-day trip to New York City, our first time there after the September 11th attacks, only about three and a half months after. And we saw with our own eyes that it was all true, that those enormous Twin Towers were in fact gone. :(

We all heard a lot about the impact the attack had on, well, everyone. Especially the friends and families of the victims, and of course the people who were in the buildings and managed to escape with their lives.
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December 28, 2009

Four Calling Birds

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Inside the Fortress — Katrina @ 11:15 pm

On this fourth day of Christmas, I guess I’ve got these four calling birds from some secret admirer. *shrug*

They won’t shut up. Chatting away on their cell phones, even while they’re driving. I try to talk to one of them, yet they keep yakking away on the phone. So rude.

Even when I invite them to dinner, they take their places at the dining table, yet they keep talking and talking on their phones, while I’m just sitting there awkwardly, as if in another world. Lame.

Eventually, the four calling birds went away, still running their mouths to the unknown being on the other end of their calls. Oh, well. Best of luck to them.

Happy 4th Anniversary, Eight Mine Fortress!!!

December 27, 2009

TSA Fail

Filed under: Christmas Time!,In the News,What the hell? — Katrina @ 11:22 pm

So on Christmas Day, there was another terrorist attack attempt on some flight from Amsterdam to Detroit. As always when such occurs, TSA craps out some more passenger restrictions in its predictable kneejerk reaction. Here’s the article.

So, basically, some guy tried to blow up the plane but failed miserably. The passengers saw what he was trying to do, seeing how very close they were to a horrible fiery death, and leapt up and subdued him, stopping what could have been a horrible Christmas for a lot of people.

How does the TSA respond? By making it illegal for passengers to move around in the last hour of the flight. So in other words… what the heroic passengers did is now against the rules. Because how dare they move around during a flight, when they should have been good little people and… let the terrorist kill them all. *headdesk*

And because a fucking terrorist will totally obey these little rules, right?

Some other rules I heard of include not allowing passengers to know the flight path or what cities or landmarks they are near. Which pisses me the fuck off because I think this means that airlines that allow you to watch your flight path on the little screen in front of you, such as JetBlue and British Airways, will now no longer be allowed to have that feature, a feature I fucking LOVE! What the shit?! :doitnow:

That’s the TSA. It’s not important for them to actually stop terrorists when the most important part is to just LOOK like it.

December 26, 2009

Caring or Controlling

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Decrees!,What the hell?,Youth Rights — Katrina @ 10:17 pm

I hereby decree…

Caring about someone does NOT give you the right to be controlling, obsessive, or insulting.

Let’s say your mom calls you when you’re heading out of town or something. She calls again a few hours later. Again the next day, about three times. And again. And again. Oh, and let’s say you finally call her on it, telling her she does not need to be calling you constantly. What is her reply?… “Aww, but I just worry about you, because I care about you.”

And that’s just a mild example, what with all the controlling things parents are advised to do with their teens that make prison look like a haven of privacy rights. Why are parents so disrespectful of privacy and insulting to intelligence? Because they care. And because they care, they have free rein to do whatever they want, and you should be grateful for it, because they care.

Bitch please! Yes, you CAN care about someone without constantly worrying they’re about to fall off a cliff or get eaten by a rabbit or something. Are you so messed up in your perception of love that you don’t realize that? Are we all expected to be so starved for love and affection and consideration that we’ll sacrifice our dignity and comfort for it at every conceivable opportunity?

Or, here’s a crazy thought. How about both caring for someone AND respecting them at the same time? *gasp, fall down* What a concept!

A few years back, my sister didn’t come home that much, constantly out with friends and whatnot. My dad was always so worried, but I wasn’t. When I mentioned this, he told me I must not care all that much about her and that I must want bad things to happen. I said that’s not true at all, that I of course care about her but at the same time respect that she can take care of herself. He insisted that was impossible. Moron.

Oh, but it’s okay to be obsessive, to call 10 times a day, to not let someone do something on their own because if you do it they won’t get hurt, to belittle someone for their beliefs because in your measly organ you call a brain those beliefs are somehow dangerous or make this person unfulfilled… because you CARE. And that’s carte blanche to just take control of everything about this person.

You just didn’t account for the fact that this person cares for her own self way too much to let the likes of you stick your ass into her business. So fuck off.

December 25, 2009

Buon Natale

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Random Crap — Katrina @ 11:11 pm

Mmmm, Christmas.

Two days ago, boss was awesome and told us to go home for Christmas at around noon, even though we were supposed to work yesterday too. Yay, extra long weekend!

Yesterday, wrapped all my presents, made some cookies, finished and posted my newest Christmas NYRA Tale, went to my mom’s Greek friend’s big ass party again, and was half an hour late for the late night Christmas Eve church service. Not sure if that’s a win or a fail. Stupid family made me late and I missed O Come All Ye Faithful. I only even go for the music, dang it! :doitnow:

And during Silent Night, waving my candle around like a lighter at a concert, while wearing my Santa hat during the service.

And this morning got to family at around 10am and shortly after started opening presents.

Then at 11am I had to leave for a bit… to go to work. -_-

Just for a minute. It may be Christmas Day, but it’s also still Friday, and the freezer’s temperature chart still needs to be changed. I got there, repeatedly said “Fuck you!” to it while changing it out, writing the time, date, and initials on it, a nice “11:17am, 12-25-09” that I’ll totally show my coworkers on Monday and totally get yelled at for. Dedication.

Then back to the house to continue opening presents. And getting what looked like a bottle of booze that was actually olive oil. 🙂

Then food.

Then more food.

Plus watching my little brother make his trains collide, in a god-like lust for transportation disaster. Incidentally, it seems the Pennsylvania Flyer kicks the Polar Express’s ass.

Now I’m sitting here next to him as he’s watching various train videos on YouTube.

Plus we’ve been having a Christmas Day Chat among NYRAnians which has been quite nice.

In this, our pseudo-White Christmas. Where the leftover snow from last weekend is getting killed fast from rain and rising temperatures. Christmas is supposed to bring snow, not kill it! :doitnow:

I love this day. 😀

December 24, 2009

If You Want It

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Musical Musing — Katrina @ 5:19 pm

So this is Christmas
And what have you done?
Another year over
A new one just begun.

And so this is Christmas
I hope you have fun.
The near and the dear ones
The old and the young.

A very Merry Christmas!
And a Happy New Year!
Let’s hope it’s a good one
Without any fear.

So this is Christmas
(War is over)
For weak and for strong
(If you want it)
The rich and the poor ones
(War is over now)
The road is so long.

And so Happy Christmas!
(War is over)
For black and for white
(If you want it)
For yellow and red ones
(War is over now)
Let’s stop all the fight

A very Merry Christmas!
And a Happy New Year!
Let’s hope it’s a good one
Without any fear.

So this is Christmas
(War is over)
And what have we done?
(If you want it)
Another year over
(War is over now)
A new one just begun.

And so Happy Christmas!
(War is over)
We hope you have fun!
(If you want it)
The near and the dear ones
(War is over now)
The old and the young.

A very Merry Christmas!
And a Happy New Year!
Let’s hope it’s a good one
Without any fear.

War is over
If you want it
War is over now.

December 23, 2009

The Proud Petless

Filed under: Christmas Time!,You Suck — Katrina @ 11:27 pm

Now for a boring, snooty edition of…

YOU SUCK!!!!

These people who do not have pets and seem to think that makes them better than everyone else.

“Ooh, look at me! I’m not some idiot who wastes money by having some smelly stupid dog around. I don’t have cat hair all over my clothes. Why would anyone want one of these stupid things? They’re such a pointless hassle. I’m smart and don’t waste my time and energy on some dumb animal.”

I’m not sure whether I want to smack these people upside the head or just fervently pity them. Maybe both.

Pity because having a dog and/or a cat is just so wonderful, a special kind of joy, and the little expenses and occasional dander and hair around the house is more than worth it.

In fact, these proudly petless jerks even overlook the single hardest thing about having pets: the sheer heartbreak when they die. Whether they just don’t wake up from a nap one day due to old age, or they ran out into the street, or they had some illness and you had to make the heart-wrenching decision to have them put down. If one were to make a case against having pets, that would be it, as any of us who’ve been through losing one knows that all too well and still feels the pain no matter how long it has been. Because when you have a pet, that’s the reality always lingering in the background, that someday you will lose your beloved furry companion.

But, goodness, don’t let one of these petless pricks know that you’re grieving for your beloved cat who was just euthanized because she had advanced cancer. They’ll be right there to inform you of how stupid and immature you are, that it’s just some dumb animal, and how they always worry about real, more important matters. Be sure to inform this person of the same after you’ve buried a screwdriver in their eye.

December 22, 2009

Separate Worlds

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Dead Tree Sandwiches,What the hell? — Katrina @ 9:53 pm

You know what annoys me? Think of any fantasy or sci-fi storyline, be it a book, movie, video game, or whatever, in which there are separate worlds or universes that somehow end up getting access to one another. One I’m thinking of is the His Dark Materials trilogy. The Chronicles of Narnia is like that to a point. Harry Potter sort of. Such is also the case in the game Kingdom Hearts, which I’m currently playing and is all kinds of awesome.

Yet there is one common theme: the worlds having access to one another is apparently a BAD thing. So in some stories, the very object of what the protagonists are doing is to close the worlds off from one another, because that allows evil to seep through or is otherwise not the natural, correct order of things. Even though the protagonist is often making friends from denizens of these other worlds, they’ll have to separate forever because they can’t coexist when they’re from different worlds.

(I’m going to be giving away ending details to the His Dark Materials trilogy, so if you don’t want spoilers for it, go out and read it before you read this further. You’ve been warned.)
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December 21, 2009

Can Hardly Wait

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Musical Musing,Youth Rights — Katrina @ 10:19 pm

Goodness, how many Christmas songs am I going to criticize?! 😀

The one of the moment is “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas”. It’s an okay song as a whole, if a bit dated. But there is one line in it that just sticks out like a Mormon on SnipeMe.

“And mom and dad can hardly wait for school to start again.”

Wow, WTF? I mean, I’m not blaming the song for this line, because it can’t help, well, speaking the truth. Line comes right after listing what some kids hope to get for Christmas. I guess like a whole this-is-what-these-people-are-thinking during the Christmas season. Kids are eagerly anticipating their gifts, and the parents… wish the kids would STFU and go back to school already.

Ah, those mature responsible adults. :irked:

December 20, 2009

Frosty the… Puddle

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Idiot Box,Think About It! — Katrina @ 6:07 pm

So on Friday night, Frosty the Snowman was on TV. The hat is put on him, he comes to life and says “Happy Birthday” for some reason, they dance around and have fun, but then they realize he’ll be gone once the snow melts.

So they figure the best way to remedy this is to stow away on a train that’s heading for the North Pole for some reason. Stuff happens and they end up off the train short of reaching the point where every direction is south, so Frosty and the little girl Karen are lost in the woods and Karen is freezing to death, so they somehow end up finding a greenhouse full of poinsettias. What luck!
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December 19, 2009

SNOMG!!!

Filed under: Check It Out,Christmas Time! — Katrina @ 9:51 pm

So we just got like 16 inches of snow. WIN!

So I went outside earlier to brush some of it off my car, then slipped on some ice, went back inside for a minute, then went back out, brushed some more snow off my car, froze, and back inside again. Good times.

Check it out…

It’s like a cross between a blue sedan and a jagged snowy mountain. This was before I started brushing snow off, but I didn’t really finish the job, and it now looks more like a jagged snowy mountain growing over my little car, all covered except for the red NYRA sticker. 😀

December 18, 2009

Season’s Greetings from NYRA!

Filed under: Christmas Time!,NYRA Happenings — Katrina @ 11:43 pm

Today, I’m proud to announce I have completed the sending of the 4th Annual NYRA Holiday Cards! Largest batch yet by a wide margin, a whopping 480 NYRA holiday cards were sent this year!

I find it interesting that this being the fourth year in a row that I’ve done this whole entry-a-day in December thing, having started that the same December I sent NYRA’s first holiday cards, this is the only time I’ve really specifically mentioned them on here, save for the bit last year about the sentient post office machine and a blurb in the 2007 and 2008 recaps.
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December 17, 2009

Two Decades of Yellow Goodness

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Here's To You!,Idiot Box — Katrina @ 11:36 pm

And now for a stateless, animated edition of…

Here’s to You!!!

So I raise my glass and say, “Here’s to you, Simpsons!”

It was twenty years ago today the pilot episode “Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire” first aired. Nah, I wasn’t watching. Didn’t start watching until the second season actually. But even before then, for some reason, I decided Bart was my favorite character. They were on the cover of a TV Guide, and I showed it to my dad’s friend and pointed to him saying “that one is my favorite”, and he said “You mean Bart?” and I’m like “oh, is that his name?” Something like that. To this day, I still call Bart my favorite character, though it’s really sort of a three-way tie with him and Lisa and Maggie, depending on the episode.
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December 16, 2009

Cut to the Chase

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Here's To You!,NYRA Happenings — Katrina @ 11:56 pm

And now for a Christmas miraculous edition of…

Here’s to You!!!!

So I raise my glass and say, “Here’s to you, NYRA!”

For today, after several weeks of toiling and bugging the crap out of everyone for votes in some Facebook contest sponsored by Chase bank, NYRA has met with success. Amazing, breathtaking, miraculous success on this December 16, 2009, nine days before Christmas and 6th night of Chanukah…

NYRA has won $25,000.

For so long, we’ve been a small-budgeted organization, weak next to bigger stronger organizations who can run big ass campaigns and hire staff who aren’t starving to death. For so long, we’ve had members who wanted to help out but didn’t know how and we didn’t know what to have them do. We’ve always been great at keeping ourselves afloat during adversity like a cork in the bath tub, but we’ve still been seemingly without direction and without a future.

Perhaps God showed us mercy. What is known is that all our people had to do was vote for us. What with it not costing anything and being very straight forward instructions, it had a recipe for success. What is known is that, somehow or another, we built our miracle at last, through Keith’s incessant calling of members, through Alex’s exhausting tabling, and the invaluable efforts of our other members, who all came together, believing that this could be done.

We built this Christmas miracle. Or Chanukah miracle, as Hal suggested, seeing as it is Chanukah right now and a lot of our members are Jewish. It wasn’t just handed to us. Well, the opportunity arose, but it took us, all of us, our determination and efforts, and we made it happen. We waited all day today for the results to get posted, biting our nails nervously, worrying it may all have been for naught. And then, around 6pm, Alex got the e-mail. And then, we found the miracle we had been building up had happened, had shown bright before us. Shining bright the future of the youth rights movement that merely six months ago we thought may just be a pipe dream. Shining bright for us to walk into and build it up together.

December 15, 2009

Doctors and Lawyers

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Random Crap — Katrina @ 5:13 pm

If you’re a doctor or a lawyer, congrats, because you’re the right type of person and are automatically a professional success.

I guess.

If you’re one of those two, congrats, because your family and friends will actually be proud of you and boast about you.

You’re a doctor or a lawyer, so that means you’re rich! ZOMG!

That’s why it’s so sad when kids die. Had they lived and grown up they could have become doctors or lawyers.

That’s why it’s so sad when kids fall into drug use and screw up their schooling. If they had stayed clean, they could have become doctors or lawyers.

That’s why no one is nearly as worried about adult drug use, because they’re already too old to become doctors or lawyers apparently. Unless they are already.

I mean, why else would you go to college? Why else would you major in biology or political science? What, are you just going to be some loser who works in a cubicle? Please. Unless your college years led to medical or law school, they were a waste of time and money.

That’s why you’re horrified to find yourself in a mediocre office job at age 45. You aren’t a doctor or a lawyer, so your life has never been successful.

If your mother thought you’d be anything but a doctor or a lawyer, she would have aborted you even if she were a staunch pro-lifer.

Failing scores on the MCAT and LSAT are a leading cause of suicide.

When you tell your second grade teacher what you want to be when you grow up, and your answer is anything other than doctor or lawyer, don’t be surprised when she and all your subsequent teachers seem to stop noticing you exist, while the kid sitting next to you wanting to take over his father’s law firm is the star pupil, and the teacher always grins sweetly at the girl across the room who dreams of working magic in the operating room.

Look at all those kids on the honor roll, especially the ones with asterisks next to their names, denoting their straight A’s. If anything other than medicine or law is on their horizon, oh what a tragic waste of talent!

If you’re a girl, well, that’s okay if you didn’t manage to be a doctor or a lawyer, so long as you marry one. Wait, you mean you didn’t marry a doctor or a lawyer? You aren’t going to get married at all? GASP! Failure!

We must help ghetto kids get an education, so they can grow up to be doctors or lawyers. The ones who don’t can stay there and rot.

We must never forget the disastrous attacks of September 11, 2001. After all, many doctors and lawyers perished.

December 14, 2009

Christmas Voyeur

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Musical Musing,What the hell? — Katrina @ 3:05 pm

Some Christmas songs are so terrible they are worth being griped about multiple times. I speak again about the entity responsible for horrid neuron-genocide known as “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus”.

Really, it does the same thing that “Santa Baby” does, in that it actually sort of implicitly sexualizes Santa Claus. In the case of “Santa Baby”, it’s about some chick wanting Santa to hurry down the chimney and bring her presents, and it’s sung in such a tune that those “presents” could be just about anything and certainly not all she wants (giggity). Which is messed up when you figure Santa Claus is like 1700 years old, and unless the singer is supposed to be Mrs. Claus, we’re talking a girl with some major daddy issues.
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December 13, 2009

Plight of Hope

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Estrogen,Rants,Youth Rights — Katrina @ 5:54 pm

I’m so sick of this crap. Look at this!

What happened to Hope Witsell

Go read that.

Pretty sad, huh? Thirteen-year-old Hope Witsell sent a boy a topless pic of herself (OMG sexting! aahhh!) and all the adults in her life go out of their way to make her life miserable over it, shaming her, convincing her she’s soiled and forever ruined… and they have the goddamn NERVE to wonder why she ended up killing herself!
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December 12, 2009

Semitic Cousins

Filed under: Christmas Time!,Decrees!,Think About It! — Katrina @ 10:50 pm

I hereby decree…

Arabs and Jews are the same people!

I might want to throw Greeks and Italians into that mix, too, for a lot of this.

Last night was the first night of Chanukah, and I can guarantee all our Jewish friends were up late and stuffed themselves with lots of delicious food. And they’ll do the same tonight. And tomorrow night. Eating and celebrating, running late into the night, with lots and lots of people.
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