August 13, 2008

Violent Video Games

Filed under: 100 Days of Summer,Here's To You!,Rants,Youth Rights — Katrina @ 9:38 pm

Now for a gory yet clever edition of…

Here’s to You!!!!

So I raise my glass and say, “Here’s to you, violent video game manufacturers!”

You people are so stupid. No, not the manufacturers. The general public. The manufacturers are quite intelligent. They see a mass of humans who will shriek at the mere idea of mixing kids and violence in any way (unless it’s violence perpetrated by the parents, in which case they’re all for it, but that’s another matter entirely). What does that usually mean? Lots of sensationalist news reports. So finally the video game makers thought to themselves “wouldn’t free advertising be awesome?”

Just about any popular violent video game that came out in the last three years at least, I first heard about it from some news outlet that was screaming its head off that this horrible violent game is going to corrupt our children (you know, our little 16-year-old children, who are apparently still in diapers and prepubescent and would spontaneously combust upon hearing the word “bitch”). All the shrill crying that these horrible games keep being made and young people are playing them and apparently being traumatized (despite not a single iota of anything close to evidence of this, ever). Dr. Phil and Oprah and other lowlife deities to the uneducated stay at home mother decry the horrors of these games and stress that they are destroying society and will turn your children into rapists (again, no where near being based on anything).

The result? More and more people are being told about this product. It’s evil. It’s killing your kids somehow. It’s responsible for every atrocity in society (often atrocities that occurred before the game in question existed). What does that always translate to?… ZOMG! I have to have it!

That’s what we see. All these mature-rated games are selling out like crazy. People are not only being reminded of the games’ existence at every turn, but most of it is them being told the games will destroy the earth.

If that weren’t enough, we’ve got some political jackholes trying to make it illegal to sell mature-rated games to anyone under 17 or whatever. Oh, yes, yes, that’ll definitely keep the games out of the hands of youth. Just like how, because the drinking age is 21, no one under that age ever drinks. Oh, my, when I was in college, nobody even knew what beer was! 🙄

Then again, as I’ve been saying here, keeping games out of kids’ hands is hardly the goal here. Quite the contrary! It increases the interest by several orders of magnitude. It’s human nature; people want what they can’t have. And because, like with alcohol, people will get it anyway even if it’s illegal and they’ll get more of it because it’s forbidden.

So do you actually believe anti-video game laws and other such rules are for kids’ protection? Then your brain doesn’t work. Come on, figure out by now that the vast majority of the time, when some policy is enacted to “protect children”, there’s quite a hefty ulterior motive there. Someone is exploiting your fickle minds and cashing in off it, and you’re sitting there thinking the kids are safe now. Seriously, your brain just isn’t working.

Are you worried about kids being exposed to violence from Mortal Kombat? Maybe if you spent less time beating the shit out of them because they rolled their eyes at you, they might have a little less violence in their lives and nothing a goddamn animation on a screen can do about it. You think kids should put down the controller to keep from being exposed to horrible violence? More like you should be putting down the switch, asshole.

This has been Day 82 of the 100 Days of Summer, Round 8.


  1. OMFG, this couldn’t be any more true!

    Comment by Robexib — August 14, 2008 @ 8:35 am

  2. That was more entertaining for me to read than my own essay.

    Comment by JerseyJ — August 14, 2008 @ 7:01 pm

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