Sure, Why Not?

Last night I was at a neighbor’s house for several hours, keeping an eye on the ten-year-old boy who lives there while his parents were out. (Can you tell I’m trying to avoid using the word “baby-sit”? He’s not a baby!) So, basically, just sat there with him watching TV all evening. Not exactly taxing. Until about 8pm, anyway, when he switched to the Disney channel to watch a movie that was coming on, some crap with Lindsey Lohan and Tyra Banks about a doll that comes to life.
(more…)

Look at this! Or, rather, listen to this.

Sniper Radio

It’s the one about the W3C.

Lord Galen himself has not only mentioned the Fortress but even had been inspired to make this radio rant by my own “I’m Not Deprecated! You’re Deprecated!” rant.

I feel so proud!

Or, maybe he’s just trying to get me to forgive him for constantly trying to marry me to Alex (*shudder* That is so disturbing!). I don’t know.

I am currently away from the computer.

Really? No shit. Imagine that something called an Away Message tells you that, hey, you’re not there! It’s like phone messages that say “I couldn’t answer the phone.” Well, thank you. I had no idea. Idiot.
(more…)

These days, in the National Youth Rights Association….

-It has come to our attention that Chris Batchelor has a hand moisturizer addiction. We of course wish Chris the best in overcoming this. It’ll be difficult. For a while, he will endure the constant, life-threatening torture and injury of somewhat dry hands.
(more…)

It hit me just right. I finally discovered I can set the target attribute for the Friends of the Fortress links so they open in a new window. Quite glad I could do so without diving into the PHP code, which undoubtedly would not turn out well. Then I saw it. On the WordPress admin page for adding a link, when I finally spotted the Target radio buttons at the very bottom, I saw the following:

(Note that the target attribute is illegal in XHTML 1.1 and 1.0 Strict.)

Reread that a few times and let it sink in.
(more…)

But I can’t say that. I also can’t say I’m white. Instead, I’m Caucasian. Apparently, I spent my early youth hanging out high in the Caucasus Mountains, chilling with Prometheus. Better yet, perhaps I should go by European American, as some literature I’ve seen dictates. I’ve never even been to Europe, let alone lived there, yet I’m a European American. I mean, with such a light complexion, that must be where my ancestors are from, right?
(more…)

There’s three fundamental annoying kinds of movie ads that I think we could all do without. They tell us nothing about the movie. They treat us all like we’re stupid (granted, that’s appropriate for most people but not for smart people like, you know, yours truly). They go out of their way to focus on shit that has nothing to do with the movie in any way, shape, or form.
(more…)

I hereby decree…

If your single friend never asked you to fix him/her up with a friend or relative of yours, don’t do it!

This makes a nice companion to yesterday’s “Mmmm Candy Hearts”. Because after the shit mentioned there, then comes another wave of relationship-related stupidity. It’s the very Disney-like urge to match up anyone and everyone who is not paired with someone already. Match makers! Don’t those two words just turn your stomach? It’s the always irritating phenomenon when a friend of yours thinks about how you’re single, and he/she has a friend or relative who is also single (almost invariably one you’ve never met and know nothing about), and thinks “Hey! Maybe I could put them together!”
(more…)

And now, for a loving and saintly edition of…

YOU SUCK!

What sucks, on this St. Valentine’s Day? The holiday itself? Nah. Frankly, I think it’s cool we pay attention to at least a handful of saints’ feast days. So what’s my beef now? What sucks? Simple. What sucks are relationships themselves.
(more…)

So I was just over on Dictionary.com checking out definitions for stuff. In one definition, I saw the word “virgule”. I had no idea what it meant, so I looked it up. Cool! It’s a slash when writing, specifically for things like “and/or”. Didn’t know that thing had a special name, but okay.

Then I came to the etymology of the word and discovered the following:

“Virgule” (or rather, Latin “virgula”, meaning “little rod” or, vividly enough “little penis”)

Hahahaha. Nice.

That is all. Now go entertain yourself elsewhere until I post again.

You know, I might say the Olympics fascinate me, but, really, I just like to watch the parade of nations and to see whatever dumb gimmick they’re doing to get that torch lit.
(more…)

I was walking around in Best Buy this morning, pawing through some CDs looking for something I might like. Can you believe that for the most part right now, I’m actually quite satisfied with the music I have? Amazing. So, anyway, I was glancing across the shelves, and my eyes fell upon something I just could not comprehend.

A Tribute to N’Sync.

Are you fucking kidding me?!

And on another pop culture related note, I’m quite pissed now. Up until today, I was able to proudly tell people that, no, I have never heard that retarded Gwen Stefani song “Hollaback Girl” or whatever it’s called. Damn Best Buy intercom music.

MySpace is stupid. Everyone knows it. It’s buggy, you get too many stupid bulletins from people who don’t realize that their stupid bulletins are annoying, too much whining, too much spamming, and I’m so sick of people putting so much shit in their profiles that it takes forever for it to load. Why the hell do people put music videos up? Who the hell actually sits and watches them? And why have music playing at all? What I really hate are the ones with music playing but they don’t provide any means of turning it the hell off! Look, when I’m at my computer, chances are I’ve got my Winamp playing. In fact, I’ve got it playing right now. “You’re My Best Friend” by Queen. Good song! But, yeah, so I’m already listening to my own music. I don’t want to hear yours.
(more…)

And now, for another fuzzy, predictive session of….

Here’s To You!

So I raise my glass and say, “Here’s to you, groundhog!”

That’s right. Today, February 2, some groundhog in Pennsylvania emerged from his little hole, saw his shadow, shrieked, dived back into his hole, and shut the door with a sign that read “Will Return in 6 Weeks”. Hopefully by then, he thinks, the scary shadow will be gone.
(more…)